Well, well, well…
What a night from The Arsenal.
What a beautiful, perfectly ugly, stunning monstrosity of a performance that was.
I haven’t enjoyed a rough game that way for a long time. That was like a hamburger at a Kentucky road stop called McJonalds. An extremely cold American Light Beer on a scorching hot day with your English friends witnessing your bold move. It was Harry Styles’ first album when no one is at home. Should I be telling people about these deviances? No. But today, we are all at one with our sufferball shame.
We all loved it. No notes. I just don’t f*cking care.
I needed a friend to call me after that Chelsea game and tell me everything was alright, no one did, and the thoughts were very bleak. Then I watched the world’s media round on my team, my players, my manager… and something clicked. I’m having my personal feelings about Arsenal hacked by some of the blandest, least interesting football pundits on the planet… these bores don’t do their own analysis, they have their views fed to them by editors, and we fall for it every time. It’s just buffoonery aimed at TikTok addicts.
So I decided to love the mess. Enjoy the nervy performances because winning Premier Leagues is hard for everyone. The job of a football team is to score more goals than the opposition. So if that goal comes from a set piece, I shall enjoy it. If it comes from a deflected Bukayo Saka shot, I shall f*cking love it. There should be no type of goal I don’t enjoy, because I am not a weirdo who has given their life to Arsenal’s sporting success only to land close to the promised land, after 22 years, and say… hmmm… not the absolute perfection Nicky Butt told me it should be.
Yeah, Nicky Butt, affecting my mood? What the hell was I thinking. I feel like a bum. My rage, getting this guy a partnership with a fractional Vietnamese cryptofarm game. How did I let this happen?
One second, let me throw on Robbie Williams, Let Me Entertain You. NO, let’s throw on Fatboy Slim, Right Here, Right Now.
Remember when this was an Arsenal song at Highbury? Feels fitting to write the rest of the post to this song, because right here, right now, we are 8 games from immortality. History could be ours. The project to take us from banter era to the promised land could complete. What’s better than that?
Enjoy it.
There isn’t really much to say about the game. Brighton have lost two games at home all season. It was always going to be a tough afternoon. There was never going to be a walloping. Things were made even tougher because Arsenal had just played an emotional wrecking ball of a game against Chelsea.
The strategy seemed pretty confident… get a goal, shut them out with the best defence in the league.
The performance was ugly. We didn’t attack. Gyokeres was nowhere. Eze worked his backside off, but didn’t really create much. Martinelli didn’t have his best attacking game. Nothing really clicked moving forward, but it didn’t seem like we cared that much about killing them.
The subs didn’t do much better, though the intro of Kai Havertz did give us a far superior option to Gyokeres, who had one of the worst outings I’ve ever seen of an Arsenal striker. But I’m not going to dig too deep on that one. I’m going to ask you to change music track.
It’s all good stuff from here.
The big story for me was who showed up to the tough away game and who did not. Until I hear the story of the scan that reveals the problem Odegaard has, I’m going to assume he’s not playing through pain, in a historic season. Out again, no timeline, Arteta said he could be available. It is what it is.
Who showed up that maybe shouldn’t have? Declan Rice. So gassed he had to exit the pitch against Chelsea. The man is playing through aches, pains, deep fatigue… but he’s there. He might not wear the armband, but we all see it. Arsenal fans know who the real captain of the club is, and it’s Declan. What a fucking player. I love him so much.
Big Gabi? Monster. Machine. King. Hero. Tone setter of everything we do. Just an insane player. He has it all. He’s playing next to a baby, and he’s still the same.
Hincapie? Another HUGE performance at left back, an even bigger one at centre back. The aggression is OFF THE CHARTS. The desire to cut out every ball, to be on the front foot, to intercept from all angles. He was a BEAST.
Jurrien Timber, another king, is playing through pain but still putting in 10/10 performances. He’s the be best right back in the league, you can’t knock him. Same for Raya, a total savage in goal. Claims every cross, always takes the hardest pass, never backs down.
What a defence we have, they are powering us to a league title, and I LOVE IT.
The real story was going off in the other games. Aston Villa, after going 1-0 up, were starting to get tanked by Chelsea. West Ham were beating Fulham. Man City were 1-0 up after a Semenyo goal… which just makes me really angry overall, because they had a Haaland issue and a central defender issue, dropped £100m and £600k a week, and it looked like it was winning.
Then Morgan Gibbs-White scored an OUTRAGEOUS backheeled goal. It was so, so good. Forest were genuinely good. They were having a pop at City. Pep’s team clearly can’t handle three games a week, that’s for sure.
Were they… bottlers? Ok, too soon. They scored a goal from a soft set piece, where Haaland was hustling Sels. It was very Arsenal. Can’t really whine about penalty box etiquette, can we?
But Forest didn’t give in. They kept on getting in behind City. Then Anderson took the bull by the horns and lashed a low shot past the best shot-stopper in the league from 20 yards. Deserved.
The ref largely did quite well against the backdrop of the cheating. City flopping in the box, begging for a penalty. Then the 7 minutes of injury time dropped, no idea where that number came from. Then the ref overran by 1 minute, the ball dropped in the Forest box with a scrum, Haaland was there, AND NOTHING HAPPENED.
Arsenal fans at Brighton caught wind and went crazy… it really felt like an iconic dual screen moment for me… but it must have been WILD to be a fan in the stadium.
Arsenal are 7 points clear of City.
Spurs are 1 point off the drop, with no momentum.
Arsenal’s next game is Everton at home, it’s the early kick-off. We play before City go to West Ham away.
We could be 10 points clear if we down Moyesy.
West Ham, at home, are no mugs, and they are in good form. Don’t look at the Liverpool result and be too fearful. They had the same xG as Liverpool at 1.86, and West Ham scored 2 goals and Liverpool scored 5. Also factor that City will be playing their 3rd game on the bounce after Newcastle in the FA Cup, then Real Madrid in Champions League.
We have Leverkusen and Mansfield away. One of those games is a REST ALL OF THEM NOT EVEN ON THE BUS DON’T YOU DARE, ARTETA, DON’T YOU DARE.
I’m not saying any of this is going to be easy, but we can all agree that a City side that just drew at home to a troubled Forest side is going to have to really pull their shit together to win all their final Premier League games.
There might be concerns about where Arsenal are right now, but I look at it differently. Since the draw against Wolves (which doesn’t look so bad after seeing them smash Liverpool and Villa)… we have won three on the bounce and two of those games were London derbies.
No one knows where this season is going to go, but we’re all here together, as friends, having a f*cking great journey this season. It has felt special all year, we’re still in the mixer for four trophies… so loosen up. Have some fun. Don’t let your algorithm fuck with your feelings, and look up, a glorious end to the season is on the horizon.
Ok, that’s me done, get the On The Whistle in your veins right now.
I wasn't paying attention to Manure but Newcastle played with 10 men for more than a full half (Jacob Ramsey was sent off at 0:0), and still won 2:1. They are a team that excels in transition, but struggle when they are given the ball with limited free space to attack.
We had posters bigging up Carrick and saying he's doing a better job than Arteta ffs. Get a grip.
I’m loving the results. Hopefully performances come but at this stage, it is about winning.
We are not here to entertain the football world, or gain favour (they will always find something to nitpick). If they want entertainment theres other avenues they can go down.
Let’s just keep winning.